Giving Advice

A chronic illness such as multiple sclerosis is a terrible thing to live with; it's difficult for the victim, but the family of the victim is also affected. The late stages of multiple sclerosis can mean that the sufferer has increased attacks of blurred vision, loss of muscle control, and even difficulty in speaking. They may come to rely heavily on the aid of family members. Where does that leave someone who is friends with the family? How do you help them cope?

Although multiple sclerosis has its own symptoms, it is much like any other chronic illness in that it can be a taboo subject. People are afraid to talk about the disease, whatever it may be, and they are even afraid to reach out at all-- fearing that they might get in the way or be seen as rude.

A recent survey consisting of over 1,000 American adults showed that while just over 80% of them knew someone with chronic illness, only a little over 30% said that they would be willing to make suggestions for improving care. Why so reluctant? Because they assume that the person suffering from the illness already has the situation under control, or because they themselves would rather get their medical advice from a doctor or someone very close to them.

One thing you can do is listen to them and try to understand their goals before offering any advice. The next thing you can do is to educate yourself, learning as much as possible about the disease. Once you feel knowledgeable and understand the family's goals, you may feel more comfortable about making suggestions and giving advice.